Last month you learned about the six key Ingredients of effective mentoring relationships and your mentor role in each of these.

Here’s an opportunity to assess yourself on these six factors. Take a few minutes to print out these pages and write your answers. Try to rate yourself as you actually are, not as you’d like to be. Consider sharing the results with one of your own mentors. You may or may not wish to share the results with your mentee; that’s up to you.

A similar role self-check is available for your mentee. In fact, your mentee may choose to show you his/her assessment and ask for your opinion of its accuracy. The two of you could use either assessment as a tool for talking about the nature and quality of your relationship and how it could be even better.

Directions: For each item, rate yourself as follows:

1. Purpose

___ This mentoring relationship is a high priority for me.
___ Finding mentees/being a responsible mentor is one of the most important steps I
      can take.
___ I’ve asked my mentee to clarify why he/she wants to meet with me.
___ I’ve asked my mentee to propose one or more goals to work on in this
      relationship.
___ My mentee and I are clear on how we’ll recognize when he’s/she’s reached the
      goal(s).
___ I feel good about the focus of this relationship and what I’m doing in it.
___ This relationship is a good use of my time.
___ From time to time I check in to see if we should change our focus in some way.
___ Once my mentee has accomplished his/her goal(s), I’m willing to see the
      relationship shift focus or perhaps end for the time being.

Total points for Purpose: ______

2. Communication

___ I communicate in the ways (in person, phone, email, mail) we agreed.
___ I get back to my mentee within the timeframe we agreed.
___ The communication between us adds up to at least one or two hours a month.
___ Occasionally, I spontaneously contact my mentee just to say hello or pass on
      some information.
___ I’m an effective listener and remember what my mentee tells me.
___ I ask appropriate questions.
___ I share appropriate information about myself.
___ I monitor my nonverbal language to be sure it’s conveying what I want it to.
___ I give my mentee suggestions for how he/she can communicate better.
___ I work on being a better communicator.

Total points for Communication: ______

3. Trust

___ I’ve talked about the topics of trust and confidentiality with my mentee.
___ I’m beginning to trust my mentee more and more.
___ I’m becoming less guarded than when we first got together.
___ I share important information about me with my mentee.
___ My mentee seems to be trusting me more and more.
___ I welcome and keep in confidence the information he/she shares with me.
___ My mentee can count on me to be honest.
___ He/She can count on me to follow through on my promises.
___ I avoid any trust-breaking behaviors such as canceling appointments without
      compelling reasons, talking negatively about others, or making excuses about why
      I don’t follow through.
___ I’m willing to forgive some mistakes my mentee makes because my trust in
      him/her is strong.

Total points for Trust: ______

4. Process

___ I ask my mentee to take responsibility for scheduling our meetings.
___ I like all or most of our meeting locations.
___ I’ve checked to be sure my mentee likes our meeting locations.
___ I like the length of our get-togethers.
___ I’ve checked to be sure my mentee likes the length of our get-togethers.
___ I’m satisfied with the way we conduct our meetings.
___ I’ve checked to be sure my mentee is satisfied with how we conduct our meetings.
___ I’m aware of the four stages of formal mentoring.
___ I’m helping us move through these four stages.
___ I’ve checked to see if my mentee likes the style and frequency of our emails.

Total points for Process: _____

5. Progress

___ My mentee has one or more specific goal(s) to work on with my help.
___ I make it easy for my mentee to ask for help.
___ I ask my mentee to take the lead on identifying interesting learning experiences to
      try.
___ I sometimes suggest learning experiences for my mentee.
___ I ask my mentee do at least one learning activity in between our mentoring
      meetings.
___ I ask for the results of his/her learning and discuss it with him/her.
___ Since starting to meet with me, my mentee has made significant progress toward
      goal(s).
___ I’m making notable progress in my ability to mentor.
___ I’m helping my mentee learn more about being an effective mentee.
___ I help my mentee celebrate progress.

Total points for Progress: _____

6. Feedback

___ I asked my mentee how and how often he/she wants positive feedback.
___ I provide enough positive feedback to my mentee.
___ I asked my mentee how he/she wants corrective feedback.
___ I give my mentee positive feedback about his/her actions and personal qualities
___ I give my mentee enough corrective feedback.
___ I graciously receive positive feedback from my mentee.
___ I encourage my mentee to show appreciation to me and other helpers.
___ I asked my mentee to give me corrective feedback about my mentoring efforts.
___ When I receive corrective feedback from my mentee, I’m usually non-defensive.
___ When I receive corrective feedback from my mentee, I take immediate steps to
      apply it.

Total points for Feedback: _____

Total points for all six factors: ______

Scoring: Add up your points for each factor, and then total all your points.

161-240 points: You seem to be a committed, effective mentor. Check this out with other mentors you admire and/or with your mentee to be sure your assessment is accurate. Continue to enjoy mentoring and continue to polish your skills.

81-160 points: You’re doing many things right as a mentor. Talk with someone even more experienced in formal mentoring to see if your assessment is accurate and if he/she has suggestions for improvement. Try to add or improve your performance on any items that you rated low.

80 or fewer points: It’s admirable that you took this assessment and want to improve as a mentor. You may be harder on yourself than you need to be. Talk with your own mentor or someone more knowledgeable about formal mentoring to see if he/she will give you honest feedback on what you’re doing right and what you could improve. Try to add a few new effective behaviors over the coming months.